On Saturday, January 12, 2009, Metropolitan Basil ordained William Rupp, a third year theology student to the minor orders of Candle-Bearer, Reader and Cantor in the Seminary chapel. These orders are the first steps on the journey to diaconal and priestly orders. Will came to the seminary from SS. Peter and Paul parish in Erie, PA. He is the son of Mr. and Mrs. Clarence Rupp of Erie. In the following article, Will shares his feelings on entering seminary and receiving orders.
Will receives tonsure from Archbishop Basil...his hair is cut in the sign of the cross.
I have struggled with fear ever since entering seminary. When I first came, it was a fear that made me doubt if I should really be stepping into the seminary at all. This ambiguous fear was one that I eventually overcame after the first year, and it probably would have gotten the best of me if it weren’t for others to guide me. A more specific fear my first year was the fear of meeting people on the brink of death in the hospital (this is still something a little scary), but my confidence grew, and again from those who had experience around me.
So, after feeling that I have conquered the fears seeing death, and feeling pretty confident after successfully finishing my first year, it was time for a summer parish assignment. My first summer assignment was in SS. Peter and Paul parish in Portage, PA. A new set of fears set in. It was a fear of failure. I wanted to do a good job and be a success. At the same time I knew this desire could be a trap in which the summer assignment becomes just about me. I eventually overcame this fear because the people I met were a great encouragement (they helped me overcome fear), and I realized that the summer was a time to discover and learn how to deal with my limitations.
A similar fear hit me as I was driving to Uniontown to spend my summer at St. John the Baptist parish (after my second year at seminary). This one was a little different because earlier that week I was feeling quite confident. I started to feel that I had more experience. I knew more theology and scripture. It was one of those fears that made me want to turn back. I couldn’t pinpoint what I was really scared of, but now I think it was simply stepping into unknown territory. Again, my confidence was boosted when I began to meet people after the Liturgy that day. In both summer assignments the pastors (Fr. Jim Spontak and Fr. Tom Wesdock) were extremely good examples.
After the summer I felt pretty good about returning to the seminary for my third year. I had finished half of my time at the seminary and again had more confidence. When I was given a
Archbishop Basil vests Will in the server's sticharion.
date about the ordination to minor orders, a fearful feeling came back. It was one in which I realized that my responsibilities are more than being just a seminarian. Now I have begun to realize that these moments of fear are really good things. They keep you from just floating through life, and make you really consider, and pray about what you are doing. Since receiving minor orders of Candle-Bearer, Reader and Cantor, the thought of the possibility of being ordained to the priesthood someday has once again come to the forefront of my mind – a small wake up call.
Sometimes I find myself spending much of the time in the seminary forgetting about the reason I am here by getting distracted in day-to day-tasks. These moments of fear always make me look at the larger picture of things, and pose the following questions for my consideration and reflection: Is this where God is calling me? Am I ready?
The answer to the second question has always been no, and has been a sign that I need to strive to have a closer, more honest relationship with God. The answer to the first one has been yes. And I probably wouldn’t still be here today if it weren’t for the encouraging faces that I see when I go into the parishes - those who support all the seminarians with their prayers. I wouldn’t still be here if it weren’t for those priests who have offered valuable advice. More and more I realize we are entirely dependent on each other. Through others, my fears didn’t get the best of me. It is really a testament to how awesome God is - God, who works through us at times when we don’t know it. Knowing that God is working in me and through others is what abolishes my fear, and gives rise to encouragement.
Metropolitan Basil made a connection in his homily when I received minor orders that made an impression on me. He pointed out how the prayers for the ordination point toward Baptism. It made me realize that it is being united to Christ in Baptism which gives us the strength to do his work. Through baptism our life with God began. God has made us his inheritance, saving us, and giving us the ability to find our vocation in life. What other promise can give us that confidence!
Family and celebrants at the ordination: his brother Dave, nephew David and father Clarence are in the front row along with Archbishop Basil and Will.
